Feeding Time for Clive!

We're sat at the kitchen table in the Griffin homestead, to my left is Jenny eating, more gorging, piles of meat and potato. Nick is to my right. Jackie brings him a cup of tea, he sits staring at it for a few minutes, looking completely bored, before pulling the tea bag out and throwing it on the floor, he whistles and there's a thud from further in the house. A grunting sound follows, the heavy breathing of something lumbering down the hall, knocking things over and falling over itself in its rush to come in.

It's Clive Jefferson. He comes crashing through the door, and on making eye contact with Nick sits completely still, his bum planted on the floor, one arm holding his weight and the other stretched ahead, a little like a cross between a dog and a gorilla. Nick looks at the tea bag on the floor and nods. Clive looks at it cautiously and starts to crawl over slowly, clearly being careful on the chance he's misread the situation. As he nears it he lowers his head, Nick stops him by saying "ahhhk, Clive, sit!". He doesn't take his eye off the tea bag, he quivers with a combination of excitement and fear. "OK then" goes Nick and Clive dives on the tea bag, like a starved animal. It's gone in seconds, he licks the floor around the seat Nick is sat at and then sits upright again, looking alert now having woken up properly.

"See, he's learning" says Jackie.
"Not quick enough" moans Nick, "I sometimes wonder why we bother, I know he sleeps on the sofa when we aren't in."
"He's lovely though Nick, watch this" says Jackie as she leans over and gives him a belly rub. Clive rolls side to side on his back, grunting and laughing with his legs in the air. Nick doesn't seem to listen, he just stares out the window.
"Oh god! Oh fucking hell! He's farted!" shouts Nick, "this is why you shouldn't excite him!"
"He'll need to go to the toilet, don't you Clive!?" responds Jackie. Clive's ears lift when he hears his name, "Clive? Toilet?" asks Jackie in a high pitched tone. Clive limps over to the door and looks up at the handle, he whimpers.
"Good Clive!" says Jackie in the same tone giving him a treat, "outside Clive, outside!" She opens the door and lets him out. He tears off to the bottom of the garden. "He can eat when he comes back in, then we can have our night together Nick"
"He eats after us, remember, that's what the book says, otherwise it'll confuse him" says Nick, "what are you giving him for treats anyway?"
"Cheese"
"Cheese!?" shouts Nick, looking frustrated, "cheese is expensive"
"But he likes cheese" says Jackie

Nick looks mad, we hear a scratching at the door. Jackie lets Clive back in, patting him on the head saying "basket, Clive, basket!". Clive crawls over to a banana box in the corner and curls up in it, he seems to fall asleep instantly.

"No more cheese for him, ok?" says Nick picking up a thin, cheap plastic wallet with the label 'IMPORTANT POLITICAL FILE' and leaving the room. Jackie looks at me, she looks embarrassed, we sit in silence for a moment.
"He's dreaming look" she says, nodding at Clive, who is kicking his legs and grunting, "I do sometimes wonder what he is dreaming about?".